so I get my day in court. we go to trial.
he offered $2500. yesterday commisinoner thinks I should take it, Lawyer says she owes it to me to try to get more. all i want is to read my statement. so I need to get some help writing it, K. I will be finding out just when, (soon I hope) and then they can play the legal aspect of it as long as I get to read my statment, then forever it will be a matter of PUBLIC RECORD what "we" were.
I saw potential for a good person I cannot help the choices he made. selfish, greedy, and a first class liar. never seen better. and manipulation ? he's expert ! and of course I am handicapped with a brain injury, but he got away with my entire life. he took from a handicapped woman!
but I have risen from the ashes before, and I was a better person for it, so I will get there again, Lord willin'.
I have these horrible moments that suck the very air out of me, I cry till I am dry, then sleep, and start all over again when I wake.
for some reason unknown to me I am alive and going through the motions. who the hell cares where it leads I am here and for now that is enough, but not for always, I want to live again, I want to enjoy the things in nature I used to. I want to walk my neighborhood without fear, wonder if I will be able to walk in the mountains again.
friends say I just need to keep going forward. well meaning tho they are they have no idea what my heart is feeling. I will not be told when he leaves this earth I will not know the joys the pains the daily life of Johnnie Larmore any more. I have never known such a bad man. I believed when he said he loved me, I believed him when he said he would never leave I believed when he said he would take care of me in my old age fucking liar. he was good at looking me straight in the eyes and lying. thats an art. Micheal you were only learning !
must remember.......
drawing somehow helps, focus maybe......
just in case I missed it the first time I will post it again... remember. mean people suck, even if you love them.
he offered $2500. yesterday commisinoner thinks I should take it, Lawyer says she owes it to me to try to get more. all i want is to read my statement. so I need to get some help writing it, K. I will be finding out just when, (soon I hope) and then they can play the legal aspect of it as long as I get to read my statment, then forever it will be a matter of PUBLIC RECORD what "we" were.
I saw potential for a good person I cannot help the choices he made. selfish, greedy, and a first class liar. never seen better. and manipulation ? he's expert ! and of course I am handicapped with a brain injury, but he got away with my entire life. he took from a handicapped woman!
but I have risen from the ashes before, and I was a better person for it, so I will get there again, Lord willin'.
I have these horrible moments that suck the very air out of me, I cry till I am dry, then sleep, and start all over again when I wake.
for some reason unknown to me I am alive and going through the motions. who the hell cares where it leads I am here and for now that is enough, but not for always, I want to live again, I want to enjoy the things in nature I used to. I want to walk my neighborhood without fear, wonder if I will be able to walk in the mountains again.
friends say I just need to keep going forward. well meaning tho they are they have no idea what my heart is feeling. I will not be told when he leaves this earth I will not know the joys the pains the daily life of Johnnie Larmore any more. I have never known such a bad man. I believed when he said he loved me, I believed him when he said he would never leave I believed when he said he would take care of me in my old age fucking liar. he was good at looking me straight in the eyes and lying. thats an art. Micheal you were only learning !
must remember.......stop whining !
1 comment:
Don't I know it. How many times have we loved people not worthy of our affections? Also, I like your sketch.
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